IC Contact Post

[mathemagier]

[Screened calls go straight to voicemail, where an impatient recording answers]

You've reached Dr. Hermann Gottlieb. Leave your name, number, and business if you expect a return call. Thank you.

Comments

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Newt nods, slowly, then with more determination. Nothing to worry about. He bites his lip and looks out the window. He fidgets with his power suppressor, debates turning it on, and then leaves it alone. He meets Hermann's eyes.]

...And what would you really like? [It's an honest question without accusation. He's trying.] This isn't just about what I'd like, and you know I'd accept a couple of days, but that sounds like a compromise in my favor, Hermann.

[mathemagier]

[He considers it, trying to feel unhurried enough to answer honestly. A week is decent notice, though still seems a bit short]

Somewhere between a week and two would be fine. But I understand you may not wish to wait that long.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[December 1st would give them two weeks--it just felt so very far away, but that would get them through Thanksgiving and their anniversary, and then give them time before the winter holidays to settle in. And in two weeks Qubit could be back. He hoped.

He removed his glasses to clean them, busying himself, distracting himself from the decision.]

...If there was no ceremony, no formal vows or Justice or license--just you and me and rings--would it still be too fast? What I'm trying to say is, is it the act of being married what I'm trying to spring on you too soon, or the state of being married?

[mathemagier]

[It's difficult to decipher the difference. What would they be if they exchanged rings without any legal binding? Does the act of getting married intimidate him?]

..The state of being married, yes. It's a significant life event, you know. I wasn't expecting it to happen so quickly. But if I had a week or two to emotionally prepare for it, I believe it would be fine.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[His smile tries valiantly to plaster itself on his face, but nothing disguises the Drift. He's disappointed. He figured that would be Hermann's answer, but he set himself up with the hope it wasn't.

The glasses have a smudge that Newt takes way too long cleaning.]

[mathemagier]

[It sits in his stomach like a leaden weight. Hermann wrings his hands together, despairing of his own hesitation]

I'm sorry, Newton.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[He shrugs halfheartedly and puts his glasses back on, still staring at his lap.]

No, Hermann, I'm sorry. ...We can wait for March. I promised you that much time and I had no right to rush you. I mean, we're no more and no less married now than we will be four months from now. ...I just have to be patient.

[mathemagier]

[Reaching over, Hermann puts a gentle hand on Newton's thigh, and attempts eye contact]

I understand your reasoning; I'm also concerned that we may not make it to March. I just need a week, Newton.

1/2

[driftsintobuffetline]

Stop doing that! Stop making concessions for me! [It's honest frustration, not anger that fuels his shrill reaction. Hermann gave and gave in this past year so many times to Newt's insisting. He feels like he's taking and not giving back enough.]

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Frustration melts into a sigh. He places his hand over Hermann's and looks sidelong at him.] I'm ...I'm trying, Hermann, [Seriousness dissolves. They've become so much softer around each other over this last year. A small smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.] and you're really messing that up.

[mathemagier]

[He doesn't say anything for a minute or so, working through whatever concessions he's been making lately. Despite the Drift, he still doesn't always follow Newton's moods perfectly- and today is proving particularly difficult]

..I just don't want you to think I'm no longer interested in pursuing this.

[driftsintobuffetline]

I...know. You might have to reassure me a few more times before it really sticks, because I'm a pain in the ass, but I know. [Mostly.

He feels drained.] Maybe we should have just parked somewhere to make out in the backseat instead.

[mathemagier]

[Leaning over, Hermann kisses his cheek and threads their fingers together]

Whatever you want to do, Newton.

[Any way he can possibly make up for putting that doubt in Newton's eyes]

[driftsintobuffetline]

...Are you deferring to me out of guilt?

[mathemagier]

[He draws back a bit, holding Newton's gaze and flounders for a response that isn't 'yes'.]

I'm not a mind reader, Newton. Do you still want to look at rings, or have you lost interest? And last I was aware, you didn't want to return home.

[driftsintobuffetline]

I know you're not a mind reader, Hermann, but you deferring to me--out of misplaced guilt or because it's my area of expertise, or whatever--is not something that happens...or at least isn't something that OFTEN happens. So look, excuse me if I want to be sure you're saying "Hey, what do you want to do?" for the right reasons and not because you're trying to make amends. Because this goes back to what I was saying, that you're making concessions for me--pushing your timelines up, stepping out of your comfort zone, giving me a showy wedding--and I don't need you to for ME. I WILL walk all over you if you keep letting me get my way--not because I want to, but because I just don't know how not to.

If you do these things, you need to do them for YOU. We need to be equal. You need to fight me. [Quieter] ...I need to fight you.

[mathemagier]

Newton, I know how to fight you.

[He withdraws his hand and pulls his door shut as the chill starts to get to him]

But if I don't have any strong preferences and something will make you happy, there's no reason to. I will insist on stipulations or conditions as necessary as a compromise, and really Newton, when is the last time you've forced me into anything?

[driftsintobuffetline]

[He fidgeted with his ring.]

You almost let me push you into marrying me today.

[mathemagier]

No, you didn't. I asked for at least a few days.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[Newt reconsiders the last hour or so.]

So I didn't force you? You're honestly okay with that arrangement and I'm not like...pushing you or Drift influencing you or just bulldozing my way through? You're going to be okay with marriage--to me--in two weeks?

[mathemagier]

I did say I was ready to marry you. And I am, Newton. Only I didn't anticipate it would be anytime within the next few days, and the nerves caught up with me all at once. But I can manage a week- and certainly two.

[driftsintobuffetline]

I guess I still don't really understand why it's so scary now and how you'll be better prepared in a week or so, but ok.

[mathemagier]

[Hermann sighs, gesturing loosely out the windshield and attempts to think of an explanation. The sky is clouded]

It's a bit like going outside and expecting a light rain. You've got a hood and so that's well enough, but you didn't prepare for a torrential downpour and you're without an umbrella.

[That seemed like a clearer explanation in his mind]

..That is to say, I expected to be married in March, and the nerves were raindrops leading up to it. Manageable, in other words. But to think of suddenly being married with nothing leading up to it-- fairly intimidating.

[driftsintobuffetline]

[For not the first, and certainly not the last time, Newt genuinely wonders how they had ever gotten off the ground in the first place. Hermann needs order, he resists spontaneity...

But some of his plans--the proposal, the assistance with the Drift, living together--however spontaneous by Hermann's standards...are some of the most magical moments of Newt's adult life.

He nods, kind of understanding the metaphor. It's hard, when Newt lives for spontaneity himself.]

Alright. You just tell me when you have a good coat and an umbrella and I'll be ready. It can be two weeks from now, two months, March, whenever. But when you say go--be ready to jump in the puddles with me, man.

Now. ...I think I'm done adulting, so how about we be teenagers and play hooky and go get us a milkshake or something.

[mathemagier]

[The tension dissipates as Newton seems to grasp what he's attempting to say, and he's more than ready for a mood change. Pulling on his seat belt, Hermann starts up the car]

Two weeks then. But before all that, we'll see about that shake and perhaps a bit of lunch.